Ah.
I feel so good now that it's over. Not that I hated it. Lol. Can you imagine trying to hide the fact that we're going to have a barbeque and two other close friends over and being with your bestie who expects to know all and might get into a dangerous mood if she thinks you don't care about her birthday??
Phew. Lol. But she's been manageable. =] And I'm glad that she liked it so much she was so speechless. NYAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. I'm not evil. Lol. Not to her anyway, because that will mean that I'm going to die very soon. Lol. Anyway, it was a great celebration.
Had to ask her mum for permission to take her out. Original venue was the beach, but oh well, her mum wasn't comfortable with it. Since we're taking her daughter out, it's better to be on the mum's good side. Haha. Golden rule. Lol. What was funny was that I actually discussed about the venue with her mum through sms while I was on the phone with her. Haha. Word.
Lol. Anyway, I enjoyed the cake. Chocolate cheese. Hmm. I know now what I want to makan. Ahaha.
What else? Oh. We hung out like old times. It was great. Just funny la, and we had a great time with everything. Ai.
Lol. And of all birthday presents, I got her a planner. Haha. The POPULAR 2010 diary. Because I know it's usually this time of the year that she'll go out and buy something like that. MWakkakakak. I don't know why I buy practical stuff. I'm more willing to get her something she can use (minus the dress and teddy bear =.=).
Anyway, 27th November marks just another year... but it's the last of her teenage years. MWAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKA. simply bah. lol.
Oh. I better start thinking of what to give her for Christmas. =] And Audrey, Qi Ying, Bradley (the last two are nominal, but since they helped out with the barbeque thing... they're AWESOME).
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Sunday, November 22, 2009
After 3 weeks
Well.
I delayed my trip back to Miri by a week, due to ticketing issues.
Anyway, starting from my finals. I'm so so so so so so happy that I coached Lynn the night before the exam. It was so worth it! Most of the questions were understandable, and I could do it. I was just crossing my fingers for all the tougher ones, and I think I made some silly mistakes, but oh well. I've never been satisfied after leaving the examination hall, but after that paper, I was so relieved and so... comforted that my hard work paid off. I got my results on Thursday, Nov 19. A-. Whoop-de-do!!!!!!
Throughout the finals, Kelvian teman me play frisbee. I tend to eat more to bring down my stress levels, see, so I decided to be more proactive about it and play Frisbee. At least I got my weight under control. I didn't get to see anyone much, except for my JPA batch. XDDDDDDDDD JPA mode is on.
After the finals was such a stress-free week. I just chilled, and started packing up because we have to clear out the latest by Nov 6, so no choice. I didn't think I had that much of things to bring home until after I've finished packing. My total check-in weight was 44.5kg. Overweight by 24kg. Great. RM 360 flew past me like that.
I now understand that I can't ever be too complacent of the things I buy. Gosh. That sucks, doesn't it? I'm an avid fan of retail therapy. XD I just buy when I see things that catch my eye, and if it's cheap or the price is right, I'll buy. Did I get the shopping bug from my dad? I believe I do. Lol. Blame it on the genes.
Anyway, I came back and rested, mostly. I just need to rest before my Kuching trip. My aim was basically to see my cousins, and some friends, and accompany some friends around. Especially those from out of state.
So I went to Kuching for a week. It was good. I'm just too lazy to say much here, but I will upload the photos on Facebook. I've been asked to do so.
Since I got back, I've got the flu bug. Oh. The horror. Like I told some people, the headache was hiding, but might come pillaging my brain. Flu stole my taste buds, and the cough nearly beat my voice to death. Of all things to be stolen, it had to be my taste buds. I need to taste my food!!!!!!!
XO Never I mind, right? Anyways, I went out with Audrey, Rachel and Muammar, for cendol. Yummy! Miss my cendol susu. XD although it was below average. Oh well. It's just good to have cheap food again. Rachel drove. AHAHAHAHHAHAHA. ok. Well, I was supposed to drive, but in the end, Rachel drove. It was funny coz all three of us were bad in some areas. Audrey was scared of reversing. I'm scared of hills and slopes. Rachel is scared of being in town. XD. lol. funny, but understanding each other, we were kinda supportive of her when she drove. LOL. funny la.
then. I got really sick. >.< And I ended up taking medication. Woo. I'm now healthy, save for the cough and the mild blocked nose. I'm going to play basket ball later to continue on my mission to lose weight. Ah. The sweetness of it all. I'm just so hungry.
Oh, I've been given a few assignments to do over this few days. One is to summarize a journal. Another is to proofread a recommendation letter. And another is arrange the articles for the Orion. =] happy-happy!
But only one of them is my source of income. The other two are just favor and just simply my passion. (Passion? Am I even passionate about anything?)
Anyway, I gotta get busy la. I need to clean my room. Huhu. It's not messy, But it's really, really ... disorganized. I have not unpacked. I must get my application things done. And I must take out the unwanted clothes from the closet so I can put my stuff inside. Oh dear. So many things to do. I just wish I have a longer holiday.
I delayed my trip back to Miri by a week, due to ticketing issues.
Anyway, starting from my finals. I'm so so so so so so happy that I coached Lynn the night before the exam. It was so worth it! Most of the questions were understandable, and I could do it. I was just crossing my fingers for all the tougher ones, and I think I made some silly mistakes, but oh well. I've never been satisfied after leaving the examination hall, but after that paper, I was so relieved and so... comforted that my hard work paid off. I got my results on Thursday, Nov 19. A-. Whoop-de-do!!!!!!
Throughout the finals, Kelvian teman me play frisbee. I tend to eat more to bring down my stress levels, see, so I decided to be more proactive about it and play Frisbee. At least I got my weight under control. I didn't get to see anyone much, except for my JPA batch. XDDDDDDDDD JPA mode is on.
After the finals was such a stress-free week. I just chilled, and started packing up because we have to clear out the latest by Nov 6, so no choice. I didn't think I had that much of things to bring home until after I've finished packing. My total check-in weight was 44.5kg. Overweight by 24kg. Great. RM 360 flew past me like that.
I now understand that I can't ever be too complacent of the things I buy. Gosh. That sucks, doesn't it? I'm an avid fan of retail therapy. XD I just buy when I see things that catch my eye, and if it's cheap or the price is right, I'll buy. Did I get the shopping bug from my dad? I believe I do. Lol. Blame it on the genes.
Anyway, I came back and rested, mostly. I just need to rest before my Kuching trip. My aim was basically to see my cousins, and some friends, and accompany some friends around. Especially those from out of state.
So I went to Kuching for a week. It was good. I'm just too lazy to say much here, but I will upload the photos on Facebook. I've been asked to do so.
Since I got back, I've got the flu bug. Oh. The horror. Like I told some people, the headache was hiding, but might come pillaging my brain. Flu stole my taste buds, and the cough nearly beat my voice to death. Of all things to be stolen, it had to be my taste buds. I need to taste my food!!!!!!!
XO Never I mind, right? Anyways, I went out with Audrey, Rachel and Muammar, for cendol. Yummy! Miss my cendol susu. XD although it was below average. Oh well. It's just good to have cheap food again. Rachel drove. AHAHAHAHHAHAHA. ok. Well, I was supposed to drive, but in the end, Rachel drove. It was funny coz all three of us were bad in some areas. Audrey was scared of reversing. I'm scared of hills and slopes. Rachel is scared of being in town. XD. lol. funny, but understanding each other, we were kinda supportive of her when she drove. LOL. funny la.
then. I got really sick. >.< And I ended up taking medication. Woo. I'm now healthy, save for the cough and the mild blocked nose. I'm going to play basket ball later to continue on my mission to lose weight. Ah. The sweetness of it all. I'm just so hungry.
Oh, I've been given a few assignments to do over this few days. One is to summarize a journal. Another is to proofread a recommendation letter. And another is arrange the articles for the Orion. =] happy-happy!
But only one of them is my source of income. The other two are just favor and just simply my passion. (Passion? Am I even passionate about anything?)
Anyway, I gotta get busy la. I need to clean my room. Huhu. It's not messy, But it's really, really ... disorganized. I have not unpacked. I must get my application things done. And I must take out the unwanted clothes from the closet so I can put my stuff inside. Oh dear. So many things to do. I just wish I have a longer holiday.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
you don't know my story...
for so long, i've dealt with people who just can't put a stop to their demeaning words and condescending tirades.
i wish people would stop comparing me. really. i'm just another person, with a different story to tell. no one shares the exact same story, nor the characters inside it, nor the plot and ending. how can you fairly compare someone with another person as a standard when there are so many anomalies?
i bumped into someone today. someone whom i didn't really care to talk to if i didn't know him. unfortunately, he still remembers me. and being polite, i had no choice but to say hi. and to have my greeting responded with a very long joke about how my mathematical skills are somewhat average compared to certain people he knows... well, i find it rather hurtful and undeserving.
which reminds me of the movie "cloudy with a chance of meatballs". i could relate to the main character trying to impress his dad. i mean, the old man didn't say a word about his son's achievements. and... well, it resonates deeply with me because i have a taciturn dad. i cried at the end of the movie, because the dad finally said something abt his son.
all this while, i've been running around trying to gain my dad's approval. to impress him. which is why he doesn't have to pressure me into getting good results. i just do because i want him to say something far more impressive than just a "good job". it wasn't just a good job. i pushed myself so hard, you know? i really pushed myself to go the extra mile.
until i got the best result i could ever get, and attained a scholarship... and realized... my dad will never say it to my face that he's proud of me. why am i running so hard for?
i still push myself, but not as bad as before. and to have this person constantly reminding me that everyone else did better on a certain subject brought back so many things. things i've buried long ago so i wouldn't remember and be hurt by them. and yet, here i am. crying.
you don't know my story... you don't know the things i fight for, the things i do, the sacrifices i've made. you don't deserve to say anything like that to me. i don't deserve it. you don't know me. you think you're doing me a favor, but there's no such thing as cruel to be kind. i hate it. i work better with encouragement and positive motivation, not with people who bring me down. i hate the fact that this always happens when it's nearing my major exam or test. why do things like this get under my skin?
it doesn't motivate me to study properly. it doesn't motivate me at all. if you don't know how to motivate me, don't. i can do it myself. i can surround myself with positive, productive people. you don't have to worry. i'm good at that. i've been on survival mode since i stepped into the kindergarten.
i wish God will teach him a lesson. i don't ever wanna hear about how my maths sucks. yeah, i no maths skills, so what? i'm better at other subjects. i'm extraordinary some things. i'm special in someone else's eyes. thank God that i survive on God's grace. on his love. i don't think i will ever survive if i didn't. huhu.
i wish people would stop comparing me. really. i'm just another person, with a different story to tell. no one shares the exact same story, nor the characters inside it, nor the plot and ending. how can you fairly compare someone with another person as a standard when there are so many anomalies?
i bumped into someone today. someone whom i didn't really care to talk to if i didn't know him. unfortunately, he still remembers me. and being polite, i had no choice but to say hi. and to have my greeting responded with a very long joke about how my mathematical skills are somewhat average compared to certain people he knows... well, i find it rather hurtful and undeserving.
which reminds me of the movie "cloudy with a chance of meatballs". i could relate to the main character trying to impress his dad. i mean, the old man didn't say a word about his son's achievements. and... well, it resonates deeply with me because i have a taciturn dad. i cried at the end of the movie, because the dad finally said something abt his son.
all this while, i've been running around trying to gain my dad's approval. to impress him. which is why he doesn't have to pressure me into getting good results. i just do because i want him to say something far more impressive than just a "good job". it wasn't just a good job. i pushed myself so hard, you know? i really pushed myself to go the extra mile.
until i got the best result i could ever get, and attained a scholarship... and realized... my dad will never say it to my face that he's proud of me. why am i running so hard for?
i still push myself, but not as bad as before. and to have this person constantly reminding me that everyone else did better on a certain subject brought back so many things. things i've buried long ago so i wouldn't remember and be hurt by them. and yet, here i am. crying.
you don't know my story... you don't know the things i fight for, the things i do, the sacrifices i've made. you don't deserve to say anything like that to me. i don't deserve it. you don't know me. you think you're doing me a favor, but there's no such thing as cruel to be kind. i hate it. i work better with encouragement and positive motivation, not with people who bring me down. i hate the fact that this always happens when it's nearing my major exam or test. why do things like this get under my skin?
it doesn't motivate me to study properly. it doesn't motivate me at all. if you don't know how to motivate me, don't. i can do it myself. i can surround myself with positive, productive people. you don't have to worry. i'm good at that. i've been on survival mode since i stepped into the kindergarten.
i wish God will teach him a lesson. i don't ever wanna hear about how my maths sucks. yeah, i no maths skills, so what? i'm better at other subjects. i'm extraordinary some things. i'm special in someone else's eyes. thank God that i survive on God's grace. on his love. i don't think i will ever survive if i didn't. huhu.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
dear...
my semester has not ended yet, but i couldn't help but post a summary of it right now, despite the lack of thought into this post.
so many things happened. lessons were learnt.
Lesson 1: Bullshit 101
I realize how it must have felt like to be on the receiving end of bullshit and empty promises. Nobody promised me anything, but I realize now it's just so... shitty.
Lesson 2: Pride comes before a fall
I fell last two semesters. Taught me a lot about humility. I hope I get an A for my Chemistry II. I think I deserve a good gift after all my hard work? Haha. That's for God to decide. But I'm satisfied with this semester because I kept my pride in check, I got to know more people, and I balanced my time well. But I feel sad. Sad because I saw the ugliness in people.
Lesson 3: Not all is what they seem
I found hypocrites. In places where I least expected them.
Anyway, I feel hyped up to study, so I'm going to go and study, despite not showering yet. XD i just woke up, and i have a headache, but heck, i shall study. =]
so many things happened. lessons were learnt.
Lesson 1: Bullshit 101
I realize how it must have felt like to be on the receiving end of bullshit and empty promises. Nobody promised me anything, but I realize now it's just so... shitty.
Lesson 2: Pride comes before a fall
I fell last two semesters. Taught me a lot about humility. I hope I get an A for my Chemistry II. I think I deserve a good gift after all my hard work? Haha. That's for God to decide. But I'm satisfied with this semester because I kept my pride in check, I got to know more people, and I balanced my time well. But I feel sad. Sad because I saw the ugliness in people.
Lesson 3: Not all is what they seem
I found hypocrites. In places where I least expected them.
Anyway, I feel hyped up to study, so I'm going to go and study, despite not showering yet. XD i just woke up, and i have a headache, but heck, i shall study. =]
Saturday, October 24, 2009
pedis ati amai
aku enda nemu nama agik ka digaga. nang pedis ati amai nggau bala diatu.
tu kemari pansut nggau pangan, iya encherita nggau aku madah ka nama ti dipadah org bukai. sida madah aku tu nang enda patut bulih mak aku arinya. kati ka asai nuan enti aku madah bakanya ngagai nuan?
ai.
ukai nama, mina aku tu bisi ga nang ngaga pengawa awak ka bulih utai bakanya. nuan ngumbai aku tu nang ngelusu baka kitak? nuan ngumbai aku tu enda kala ngasai ka pemedis ngaga pengawa skula?
aku pen enda nemu lapa aku agi manah nggau kitak, sempama sinu ka kitak ka dikumbai aku pangan ajak meh.
aku pun pedis ati nggau urang ka enda nemu megai ka janji. udah nusi brapa kali, nuan nemu aku tu mali ninga nuan enda nitih leka janji. lapa nuan ka bendar ngaga aku tu merinsa? lapa nuan tu enda nemu bterus trang madah ka nuan enda ulih ari pun-pun tu tadi? lapa ka ngaga aku tu pedis?
arap ka Allah Taala tauk meri ati aku tu bisi pengelantang. awak ka enda iboh ka bansa kitak nya ka enda nemu bepikir ka ati urang.
tu kemari pansut nggau pangan, iya encherita nggau aku madah ka nama ti dipadah org bukai. sida madah aku tu nang enda patut bulih mak aku arinya. kati ka asai nuan enti aku madah bakanya ngagai nuan?
ai.
ukai nama, mina aku tu bisi ga nang ngaga pengawa awak ka bulih utai bakanya. nuan ngumbai aku tu nang ngelusu baka kitak? nuan ngumbai aku tu enda kala ngasai ka pemedis ngaga pengawa skula?
aku pen enda nemu lapa aku agi manah nggau kitak, sempama sinu ka kitak ka dikumbai aku pangan ajak meh.
aku pun pedis ati nggau urang ka enda nemu megai ka janji. udah nusi brapa kali, nuan nemu aku tu mali ninga nuan enda nitih leka janji. lapa nuan ka bendar ngaga aku tu merinsa? lapa nuan tu enda nemu bterus trang madah ka nuan enda ulih ari pun-pun tu tadi? lapa ka ngaga aku tu pedis?
arap ka Allah Taala tauk meri ati aku tu bisi pengelantang. awak ka enda iboh ka bansa kitak nya ka enda nemu bepikir ka ati urang.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
something
i was reading through so many blogs today and just kinda wondered to myself, why do i even bother to keep a diary to chronicle my daily ravings?
i don't know. but it sure is fun to do it.
at this moment, i am looking at my pile of "trash" on my roommate's bed, and wondering how on earth am i going to clear it later.
and i have applications to do. so i will have to get it done as soon as possible, as well as i have an appointment with a friend tomorrow, cuz she needs help with numerical method. thank god for my a- in calculus 1. although i feel ashamed of calculus 2. ah. sick.
anyway.
yes.
applications
essays
quiz
test
finals
room cleaning.
i'm exhausted just from thinking about them.
oh. lab reports.
crud. i hate it lar.
aiyo. anyway, will upload pics someday.
i don't know. but it sure is fun to do it.
at this moment, i am looking at my pile of "trash" on my roommate's bed, and wondering how on earth am i going to clear it later.
and i have applications to do. so i will have to get it done as soon as possible, as well as i have an appointment with a friend tomorrow, cuz she needs help with numerical method. thank god for my a- in calculus 1. although i feel ashamed of calculus 2. ah. sick.
anyway.
yes.
applications
essays
quiz
test
finals
room cleaning.
i'm exhausted just from thinking about them.
oh. lab reports.
crud. i hate it lar.
aiyo. anyway, will upload pics someday.
